Orphaned Computers & Game Systems

(Archive)
Vol. II, Issue 2    February 1998


The OC&GS Forum

Letters and Maybe Some Replies

The amount of mail that's been pouring in is amazing. It seemed that as soon as the first issue of Vol. II was sent out, we started getting a lot of reader feedback. The mailbag is full, folks! Here are just a few samples. Thanks, and keep 'em coming!

YOU, ADAM TRIONFO, MAY HAVE ALREADY WON $10,000,000!!!!

Simply affix your Gold Prize Seal to the inner envelope, and write your Super-Duper Prize-Winner ID Number in the blank. If your name is one of those pulled from Ed's hat, the next Grand-Prize Winner will be Mrs. Trionfo from Albuquerque !!!

Public Service Company of New Mexico

Item........................Cost

Electricity, 31 days........$35.47

YOU are an ORIGANOL SINNER, and you must REPENT or burn in the FURNASS OF HELL forEVER. Send five dollars to the adress below, and then make ten copys of this letter and send them to all you're friends. If you do not follow these instructions, you will BURN ETERNALY! If you don't have the cash, then fruitcake is OK.
      [Address omitted by editors.]

Dear Mr. Federico,

We are sorry to inform you that we cannot process your order, as we are all out of Item #42 ("Ms. Pinky -- For Guys With All Thumbs"). Please choose another item from the catalogue. If you wish, we will send a full refund.

We regret any inconveniece.

Sincerely,

The Adult Doll Liquidation Warehouse
      "Our customers are special"

Beef patties only $3.95 per package
Egg nog $1.29 per gallon
Women's razors just $.99 per package
ENJOY THESE AND OTHER WINTER SAVINGS AT NELSON'S FOOD-O-RAMA AND DELI !!!!!!
Please bring this coupon for the razors.


Dear OC&GS,

My mom says that video games make kids violent. I think she's full of shit. What do you guys think? By the way, I think you should put your articles on the Internet, because your newsletter would seem more professional.

From Jimmy Casey, Age 12

Dear Jimmy,
      Well, we're pleased to say that you've made a very good point. Your mom is, indeed, full of shit.